At last I reached back to home.The continuous 35 hours journey made me burn out.It was tiring but I enjoyed the journey.I love travelling.As I was travelling in the bus I saw a mother and she was holding her small child in hand.There was no seat in the bus for her to sit.So she gave her child to the old man one who was sitting in bus.Suddenly the child start to cry and made a big noise in the bus as the child was reluctant to move a little away from her mother.But as time passed the child became so cool and started to play with man and became so playful.Again after some time childs attention went on to her mother and started to cry.The old man tried his best to make the child happy but every attempt went to vain.Child cried and made all the noise and when she saw the face of her mother she stoped crying and jumped to her.Then she became so happy and at peace.
This gave me a look on my life.Yes I too have the same character.Whenever I do sin my mind is not ready to that and was telling me to do not do.When I say a lie my mind is objecting my plan and I continue with my plan.When I ignore this primary objection of my mind then I have no problem to say lie again.But you know after ignoring all the objections of my conscious ,for some days I can go forward and live peacefully.But then allways in my mind a cyclone takes birth that destroys all my peace and urging me to make treaty with God.The cyclone of repentance, which all ways lead me to confession.In the confession cabin I allways find my God again and again and that moment I cant express with the words.
I felt the above said child and myself are same because when first the child moved from the sight of her mother she was not so happy,and reluctant to it.But she changed her mind soon and attracted towards the new condition and she couldnt enjoy the new condition for long time.Again her mind started to search for her mother.She knew that she is from her mother and she is for her mother and all others are not for her. This reality written in her mind when she born in to this world.So she is ultimately happy and peacefull only at the presence of her mother.
I too like this child that sometimes I may went away from the presence of God,but soon my mind reminds me that only God is for me and I am for him.I can be happy only with him.So suddenly my mind looks for God.I am so happy when I found him again because the living God is very near to a repenting heart.
God my love,I thank you for helping me to find you again and again.And I ask you pardon for all my sins.Please have mercy on me my God and my love. THANK YOU LORD JESUS CHRIST. your jeril amen
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